My second trip to the ER

Some people find good fortune in their lives. One of mine is that I've only been to the Emergency Room twice and incidentally, they've both been with our beloved Elizabeth. A few weeks ago I received a call from our dear Elizabeth who sounded less than perky on the other end of the phone. "What's up?" I inquired. "Can you take me to the doctor?" I knew it was serious since it was a Sunday afternoon. Upon my arrival to the Damico apartment I found Elizabeth barely able to move because of tremendous pain she was experiencing. While we waited for her dad to arrive (we were both level-headed enough to realize Micaela shouldn't be left alone) we searched for a clinic/hospital to go to. We had enough time to discover which facility ranked well in terms of bedside service, food, and treatment. After weighing all the factors we drove to Fairview Riverside Hospital; I was glad to finally have a legimate reason to use the police lights that I previously purchased when they were selling of Chips memorabilia.



Since Elizabeth was born at Fairview Riverside they had all her information on file but that didn't mean she was excused from giving her symptoms and medical history at least 10 times to the professionals. Later when I reviewed the rankings of the hospitals, I discovered Fairview ranked low on efficiency of files - oh well.



After limited time in the waiting room across from a young girl who had her nose clothespinned shut, we were escorted to a room where Elizabeth was asked to lie in the bed that was directly in the center of the room - a true ER moment which would allow all staff to come rushing in at a moment's notice and get at every angle of her body. Fortunately such drastic measures were not required and the only person who came in was a good-looking resident, Dr. Galvez. After his intial leaving, Elizabeth turned to me and said, "Of course I would get the hot Latino doctor." Contrary to my first ER visit with Elizabeth, the doctors and nurses who assisted us did not provide as many funny comments. However, Dr. Galvez did say, "I'm putting my hands in hot water so that you will like my hands. Hopefully that will make it better." I had all I could do to not keep from busting my own gut in the corner, and fortunately Elizabeth and I could not make eye contact.



By now you may be wondering what kind of symptoms Elizabeth displayed. After describing what had been happening all afternoon and the location of her pain, they were convinced it was her gallbladder. Dr. Galvez said that sometimes he sees sludge - gross! Who wants to know they have sludge in their body?



After another period of waiting the long-haired, straight-talking (and almost equally attractive) doctor burst through the door saying he was the one actually in charge. "So you had one of those good weekend breakfasts and now you're in pain. Did you at least go somewhere good?" he asked. Elizabeth responded, "I went to the Dinkytowner." "So you went somewhere bad? That's not even worth it. If you woulda had coffee that would've taken care of it - try that next time." His comments may sound unsympathetic, but honestly he was funny and seemed to enjoy his job - especially when two funny ladies came in on a Sunday afternoon.



At this point in our ER visit it was determined necessary for an ultrasound to performed on Elizabeth. No, don't go there - Elizabeth was not having a pregnancy ultrasound! Hospital policy seemed to be that transportation of patients was either by bed or an extra wide wheelchair to the ultrasound area. Elizabeth chose the wheelchair option, and as we were escorted to the ultrasound area I'm pretty sure we were being escorted into a danger zone in order to be abandoned. Walking down a windy, unlevel, sterile white hallway past signs which read"Danger, do not enter" I wondered where we were going. The hallways were abandoned; the wheelchair driver said he didn't know where he was going. At this point I was suspicious that we were being led into a place beyond return and began to drop bread crumbs just in case we needed to escape and find our way back on our own.



In the ultrasound waiting room I found the perfect souvenir for Micaela - a Mickey Mouse and gang surgical mask. Hopefully she still has it because with this recent outbreak of the swine flu she may need it. I know the seventh commandment says you shouldn't steal, but in such instances I think it is okay.



After the ultrasound we were instructed to wait in the abandoned hallway for another wheelchair driver. I was glad that I did leave the bread crumbs because it took forever for someone to come and find us - I thought we were maybe left to fend for ourselves.



I must be honest and say at this point I was becoming a little antsy so that when we returned to our room for further waiting I turned on the TV. Since I do not have a TV I thought we could find something good using the hospital cable. I should have known better and when Dr. Galvez came back to report that the ultrasound was clear I couldn't figure out how to the turn the TV. When such a things happens to you, it is best to turn the volume down and pretend like everything is normal. When nurse Nancy arrived I confessed my inability to turn the TV off. Clearly it was a neglected apparatus because it refused to be turned off.

We left the hospital with a painkilling narcotic prescription and headed home. As I commented earlier, this ER visit wasn't nearly as funny as the first one. Maybe it was the absence of Many which made all the difference, or the fact that Elizabeth wasn't nearly as ill as the first experience. Regardless, I'm glad that my ER visits are not frequent and that when I get to go, I get to go with Elizabeth.